Saturday, April 9, 2016

Envy

A to Z Challenge: E

Perhaps a little poem for the letter E? I try not to envy those around me for the things they obtain, own, have, or work for. One man's treasure is not mine to want. However, I have, at times, spoken out about the means one might use to gain something because it appeared they earned what they did because they were a favorite, or they felt they were entitled to it, or because it was just given to them "because...".

But, I learned the hard way that those "treasures" and how those people gained such treasures are not mine to judge either. And being vocal about any of it will get you no where. People will take your outspokenness and use it against you; put words in your mouth that you didn't say, call you jealous. Again with the conflict.

But we don't live in a world where we are treated fairly and equally, do we?

So, envy... not usually a thing with me, but speaking my mind is. Regardless, I guess envy is a wasted event, as is speaking your mind too often, so how do you know you need to step back?

When you look in the mirror and notice that your eyes have changed...


Envy the Exterior

Hear the humor in our lies
What we tell ourselves to get by

Drink with me good fellows:
Let us sip of God's sweet wine
What sins must we create
before this glass breaks?
(and we bleed)
The cavity, this pain...

I walk the streets of this dirty town,
damning the beast who created me

Had he no faith that I couldn't breathe?
Tragic misfortunes -
we've all got a story to tell and a story to sell
but nothing is worth more than this broken dollar
I've got in my pocket
(with In God We Trust embossed in green)

Green, like the color of my eyes
(and I swear, I could never lie)
A lone girl steps in front of me
(she's crossed my vision once before)
“She's a statistic waiting to happen.”
Am I the next Jane Doe?

Yesterday, I checked the gas station mirror
to make sure my eyes had not changed

This is what we have become
Spare me your pity and Christian lies
I've been hungry a time or two
Have you?

Hunger:
frames the mind
and thickens the blood
Throw your Bible books out the window
and go pray on someone else's shame
(or is it prey?)

Sip of the sweet life, good fellows
Is this all there is?

Yes, lone bleeder;
this and what we tell ourselves to get by

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